Day 102: "Under the Blood Moon, a man bitten is a man cursed."

Holy crap what a bad movie.  Red Riding Hood is VERY LOOSELY based on the Grimm's fairy tale, and by loosely, I mean they probably waved a book of stories over the script for this mess.  From the look of this movie, director Catherine Hardwicke's ambition was to out Tim Burton Tim Burton.  The production design looks like someone's idea of what a middle age village should look like.  She obviously watched Sleepy Hollow quite a few times and was trying to emulate the look.  A for effort, F for execution.  I mean, come on, every tree in the forest looked like it was made of spikes.  The story, such as it is, wants to be a gothic version of a werewolf tale, while injecting a modicum of modern teen angst/romance into the mix.  Nope, that didn't work either.  This was just a complete waste of time.

Amanda Seyfried is Valerie, the titular Red Riding Hood.  She looked like a lost dog wandering around a strange city; eyes wide open, head constantly cocked to one side, and brow furrowed.  Gary Oldman was Father Solomon, the veteran monster hunter with a dark secret of his own.  I have come to expect that he rarely picks a bad film, looks like I found one.  Billy Burke and Virginia Madsen play Valerie's parents, a couple who look like they never got past the rigors of adolescent worry.  The rest of the cast is just as uninspired.

**SPOILER ALERT** The wolf did it.  I'm sorry kids, but this was dull, predictable, and downright stupid the entire length of the movie.  Looks like I was justified in my concerns in taking a 6 page fairy tale and trying to make it a two hour movie.  I just hope that the producers learn their lesson from this and stop any further fable from coming to your local cineplex.  I mean how good could Quentin Tarantino's The Tortoise and the Hare actually be.  Red Riding Hood?  Skip it, see Legend or The Neverending Story instead (this is quite an endorsement for me, as I had a real problem with the base principle of The Neverending Story.  IT ENDED.  More on that later, though).  3/10.

See you tomorrow, and GO WATCH A MOVIE!!